fanciful devices: 08/2016

A Stone Is Nobody's

A man ambushed a stone. Caught it.
Made it a prisoner.
Put it in a dark room and stood guard over it for the rest of his life.

His mother asked why.

He said, because it's held captive, because it is captured.

Look, the stone is asleep, she said, it does not know whether it's in a garden or not. Eternity and the stone
are mother and daughter; it is you who are getting old. The stone is only sleeping.

But I caught it, mother, it is mine by conquest, he said.

A stone is nobody's, not even its own. It is you who are conquered; you are minding the prisoner, which is yourself,
because you are afraid to go out, she said.

Yes yes, I am afraid, because you have never loved me, he said.

Which is true, because you have always been to me as the stone is to you, she said.

Russell Edson

FAQs

1. Are you a Southeast Asian dancing girl from the 1800s?

No, sorry to disappoint. My avatar and banner images are from an ancient book I found in the depths of my grandmother's cabinets. More on that here.

2. How do you make everything look so old?

First, you need a good oxidizer to brush on every bit of metal you can reach. I'll tell you all about it here.

Then there's this wax. I first mentioned it here. You'll have to scroll down a lot.

3. How can you be so productive?

I'm insanely obsessed and I have no offspring. I do nothing else- I don't have a day job, I don't clean my house or cook, I spend all day in pjs, often completely abandoning personal hygiene... I only interact with other humans when I walk my dog. And I like people! But I prefer dogs.

And I'm sloppy- but I make that sloppiness work for me.

4. Any tips you'd like to share?

No! Except for these 16 posts about techniques and this one about how to find your aesthetic.

5. Would you be offended if I took some inspiration from your designs?

Well, I'd be happier if you outright copied them.

No really, imitation is how we learn. I have enough ideas to go around. And even if I don't- please. No one's going to do this obsessively enough to threaten my business. (Probably.) I learned by copying others and I've seen others copy me as a step toward developing their own voice. So feel free. (I'd love if you tossed me a link in my comments, so I can feel like a proud momma.)

6. What do you look like?

Why, what have you heard? Really? Wow.

8/21/16

Happy days are here again.

OMG y'all! I'm so happy to report I don't feel like shit anymore! At all! Exclamation point!

OK, OK, OK, so like a month ago, shortly after my surgery I was feeling so dizzy I could hardly walk. So in a panic I googled what to do for dizziness. Like, they were addressing mostly feelings of imbalance, like that earth-tilting thing? Mine was more groggy and like when you get up after being on your ass for hours and you get so dizzy you almost fall down? Yeah several times I had that so bad I'd momentarily loose ... awareness? And I'd wake up after a split second in a downward-dog pose (my attempt at not falling over right before I lost it) not remembering where I was or what I was doing. I suppose that counts as fainting hu? Wow what a Victorian heroin am I.

AAANYWAYS so yeah but so I googled and mostly it was crap like "eat something" and "stretch" but one suggestion was iron supplements. Which reminded me ages ago my doctor said I should be taking them anyways. And I asked if you don't just pee all that out and she said only the water soluble stuff. And apparently iron ... it's actual metal... so yeah it takes about a month to kick in and here I am a month later and OHMYGOD.

So yeah when I was little my mom always told me I might be anemic. Decades later, turns out I was. You guys! I feel so good for the first time in ever! You know how you can feel such profound relief that it actually feels like ecstatic joy? Yeah.

Also I've been working non-stop for the first time in like, idk, three years? Four? And this tute I'd been putting off ever since I made my last ones, Starry Shards, in 2014 -- I just one day got up and started making it! I'm still working on it now. But it's not like pulling teeth like the last one where I actually paid a friend to write the first draft (by just following whatever she thought was going on in the pictures) cuz that's how much I didn't want to do it. Or was overwhelmed at the prospect. Now I'm writing this one and its... fun? Is that even possible?

OK, it's still going to be a while I have a lot more to go. And all my projects which I always think are quick and self-explanatory always end up becoming encyclopedic tomes, so. In the meantime I managed to photograph these four necklaces.

And thank you guys so much for your suggestions about the necklace with the awkward ring from last post. As soon as I finished that post though I knew I had to fix it or I wouldn't have been requesting suggestions. My solution was to smallen the ring AND change the charms a bit.

Ok but now it has a whole 'nuther problem. I test drove it and the choker that rests against the back of the neck is super scratchy cuz of the wool.

So that bites. I think I'll cut the wool to halfway up the choker and wire wrap it to end there. Good thing I took and edited these before once again changing this damn thing!!! Good thing I'm feeling good and energetic so I don't really mind. I'll get there eventually.

To celebrate how good I feel, here's some happy animals from my ver favorite Instagram account, #petsvideo:

A video posted by Animals (@petsvideo) on Aug 18, 2016 at 10:18am PDT

A video posted by Animals (@petsvideo) on Aug 13, 2016 at 8:01am PDT

A video posted by Animals (@petsvideo) on Aug 12, 2016 at 11:53pm PDT

A video posted by Animals (@petsvideo) on Aug 2, 2016 at 10:08pm PDT

A video posted by Animals (@petsvideo) on Aug 3, 2016 at 3:46am PDT

8/3/16

So much stuff.

I know it's been a while and yeah I first was being totally inactive but then I had a week-long out-of-town wedding. It was in Connecticut and you haven't lived until you've listened in while my parents try to figure out how to pronounce Connecticut.

Mom: Coneddy cat?

Dad: No Matilde, it's CONNECT, co-NECT-ee-cat.

Me: Yeah Dad, connect-the-dots, sure.

The wedding was amazing actually but damn that's a lot of socializing. Above, carnelian and antique coral branches.

Sterling studs from Inheritance haul, one of which I soldered a loop on to. The ovals I sewed some super antique lace on steel frames. I had to do a bunch of whatchamacallit... darning! Which I just made up as I went along. It doesn't even seem like a real possible thing until suddenly a bit of sloppy textile is forming under your needle. After, I added a polyurethane coating.

Oh and after the wedding we had another week (ok, 4 days but it felt like a month) of sister/niece/nephew/dog visit. Oh boy.

Ok, look at this maddness. Real druzy AND fake druzy in the same pair! And if you look closely at the fakes, one is white and one is translucent.

Stacked graduated semi-asymmetrix with my decoupaged polybabies.

I even made these but I'm not photographing them properly until I take out those ugly knots and solder the rings shut instead.

As for necklaces, here's one I forgot to blog last time. Mom wanted to buy it for herself for the wedding since her dress was blue. So she wore it all day to test it out and said it was the first time she'd ever received random compliments on jewelry. As we were getting home I said you know someone might have bought it. Snooze = Loose, etc. Sure enough, someone had.

She survived the wedding without matchy jewelry.

This batch includes a bunch of chunky short neck candy. I have this mannequin pic at an angle so you can see the dimension. (Don't worry Sparrow, there's another one head-on for the listing.) I painted that textile cord with washes of black acrylic to darken it and tone it down.

Look at this cute and simple copper baby. The pot was a gift from... Tribalis? The big ol' smokey pink stone was this last little mini haul from and etsybud. God I get a lot of gifts. I've said that many times. I should just abbreviate: GIGaloG.

Like this hindi piece from Inheritance haul and giant labradorite from Patroness. GIGaloG!

I acquired almost all these bits myself! Horse brass with elephant, a bunch of honey and orange things... Oh, so I follow quisnam on Instagram and she's been using horse brasses and it inspired me to poke around for some. I found this etsy shop that had a bunch of mini ones for cheap! So I ordered them all. Now, I don't feel bad "stealing" this idea from quisnam since I made several horse brass necklaces back in the day so. And I'm gonna mail her one I think, as thanks for the inspiration.

Is this cool or just the hottest of messes? Maybe if I made that one ring smaller... Should I list it or smallen the ring? Anyone?

Oh so when the cobalt choker got bought I made this for mom but she didn't like it. Because she's nuts. Round stone from Teapotsandtelephones (who has a new paper shop!) crystal pendant from Inheritance haul and even cobalt vintage Italian glass from recent etsybud haul. GIGaloG!

OK, I'll stop just listing sources.

This one is all about graduated circles. On either side, a double chain, one of either being a length of double-hole seed beads.

I completed this bracelet to my satisfaction, tightening the findings at the end.

I'm trying out an inward-facing bracelet hook and it's actually easier to close and more secure. Who knew.

I also finished this one with more tiny dangles along an extender chain and the citrine briolette at the tip of the focal exchanged for more danglies. Simplified and made more harmonious.

Here's a double wrap full of amber honey oranges and warm light. An oval of resined paper taken from an old art book riveted on to a scrap of tin, even my first bit of macrame using leather.

It is hot as ball sweat in Chicago. I'm telling you. Look at this lovely bracelet. It doesn't deserve to be next to a mention of ball sweat but that's life.

I even have a set of Chinese ink painting connector polies. Maybe this is too big for a set. Maybe I'll split it into two and give peeps the option like so:

Awww yeah problem solved.

Here I am looking up at a meerkat in a aquarium we went to while in Connecticut. What were meerkats doing in an aquarium?

Idk but I had to go clothes shopping for the first time in decades for the wedding and you know you're old when you're walking around stores all baffled going, "This is what people put on their limbs and torsos now? But...?"

So while there, Dad and I were fighting- him saying how this one beach was awesome me saying the sand was all sharp stones (turns out we were in different ends of the beach but). He starts making this mocking whiny face like I'm a big wussy and I go "Dad stop being a dick." And we keep arguing like that cuz that's all we do. I didn't hear his direct response cuz I was too busy arguing but after my friend, between laughter tears, says that he answered, "You brought the dicks!" Like, I started it cuz I was dissing this great beach.

But lets review:

Me: Dad, stop being a dick.

Dad: You brought the dicks!

So of course for the rest of the trip, every time someone was being whiny/complaining/ arguing I had to say, "Don't bring the dicks!" Needless to say I had may opportunities to use the phrase and Mom wasn't pleased.