fanciful devices: Woo-Hoo!!!

A Stone Is Nobody's

A man ambushed a stone. Caught it.
Made it a prisoner.
Put it in a dark room and stood guard over it for the rest of his life.

His mother asked why.

He said, because it's held captive, because it is captured.

Look, the stone is asleep, she said, it does not know whether it's in a garden or not. Eternity and the stone
are mother and daughter; it is you who are getting old. The stone is only sleeping.

But I caught it, mother, it is mine by conquest, he said.

A stone is nobody's, not even its own. It is you who are conquered; you are minding the prisoner, which is yourself,
because you are afraid to go out, she said.

Yes yes, I am afraid, because you have never loved me, he said.

Which is true, because you have always been to me as the stone is to you, she said.

Russell Edson

FAQs

1. Are you a Southeast Asian dancing girl from the 1800s?

No, sorry to disappoint. My avatar and banner images are from an ancient book I found in the depths of my grandmother's cabinets. More on that here.

2. How do you make everything look so old?

First, you need a good oxidizer to brush on every bit of metal you can reach. I'll tell you all about it here.

Then there's this wax. I first mentioned it here. You'll have to scroll down a lot.

3. How can you be so productive?

I'm insanely obsessed and I have no offspring. I do nothing else- I don't have a day job, I don't clean my house or cook, I spend all day in pjs, often completely abandoning personal hygiene... I only interact with other humans when I walk my dog. And I like people! But I prefer dogs.

And I'm sloppy- but I make that sloppiness work for me.

4. Any tips you'd like to share?

No! Except for these 16 posts about techniques and this one about how to find your aesthetic.

5. Would you be offended if I took some inspiration from your designs?

Well, I'd be happier if you outright copied them.

No really, imitation is how we learn. I have enough ideas to go around. And even if I don't- please. No one's going to do this obsessively enough to threaten my business. (Probably.) I learned by copying others and I've seen others copy me as a step toward developing their own voice. So feel free. (I'd love if you tossed me a link in my comments, so I can feel like a proud momma.)

6. What do you look like?

Why, what have you heard? Really? Wow.

9/5/14

Woo-Hoo!!!

Y'all I'm so energized by my new discovery of this thing called eks-ur-saizuh it's not to be believed. I've only been four times and I already feel better than I have in like a decade. I already knew I had to be doing this ages ago, I'm a moron.
Master Passion. Victorian tribal assemblage dangle brooch with porcelain rose plate, rough agate and salvaged tin.

Master Passion. Victorian tribal assemblage dangle brooch with porcelain rose plate, rough agate and salvaged tin.

Master Passion.
Fade and Remain asked, "What kind of music do they play at Zumba?? I'm scared, I want to, but reggaeton. RAGGAETON... Your audience needs to know."
Springtime. 3 earring pair sets, speckled polymer beads in mustard, coral and light blue pastels. 11mm.

Springtime. 3 earring pair sets, speckled polymer beads in mustard, coral and light blue pastels. 11mm.

Springtime.
LOLOLOL. My gym has hip hop dance classes as well which I might focus on. As for Zumba, yeah the movements are all based around the basic Salsa step and the music's all like house-ified beaner toonage. I prefer hip hop cuz I'm no good at being hispanic in general.
Springtime. 5 speckled polymer beads in mustard, coral and light blue pastels. 10mm.

Springtime. 5 speckled polymer beads in mustard, coral and light blue pastels. 10mm.

Springtime.
And you have to accept that you'll look like a fool for the first many times, maybe forever. But no one cares. There's like old Chinese ladies twerking it out...
Easter. 6 speckled polymer beads in white, coral and pastel spotted. 10mm.

Easter. 6 speckled polymer beads in white, coral and pastel spotted. 10mm.

Easter.
One of the things I like is this ethnic mix where white folks are for sure the minority. On the other hand seeing myself looking so white in the mirror is a bit scary. I'm so pale I look yellow, y'all.
Bit o' Glam. 5 white polymer beads links with gold glitter speckles and oxidized brass mini caps.

Bit o' Glam. 5 white polymer beads links with gold glitter speckles and oxidized brass mini caps.

Bit o' Glam.
But we got mostly black and Mexican then a slew of Chinese and Indian with a sprinkling of white. Why does that make me so happy though? Any of y'all uncomfortable when you're in a place with only all white people?
Concrete. 4 pale green polymer clay artisan doughnut bead links with pitted speckles and dark brass caps.

Concrete. 4 pale green polymer clay artisan doughnut bead links with pitted speckles and dark brass caps.

Concrete.
ANYWAYSES, as you can see I've been experimenting with beads and finishes. Some that came out a bit boring I decided to offer capped, as that adds a nice touch. I love simple caps without any extraneous filigree crap. Crusty Glam. 3 dark polymer clay artisan bead links with gold and black speckles and oxidized brass cone caps.

Crusty Glam. 3 dark polymer clay artisan bead links with gold and black speckles and oxidized brass cone caps.

Crusty Glam.
Oh and I finally got me a pack of black cardstock and never has been photo-ing and editing so fast and easy. I'm friggin' high over it I'm so stoked. I was using one same sheet before and that crap got so filthy, I seem to spread lint and spots wherever I go. And that led to hours on Photoshop blurring out little flecks of whoknowswhat. Yeah. It only took me 5 years to figure out my etsy photos, it's cool.
Crusty Glam. 4 dark polymer clay artisan bead links with gold and black speckles and antiqued bronze caps.

Crusty Glam. 4 dark polymer clay artisan bead links with gold and black speckles and antiqued bronze caps.

Crusty Glam.
So I edited and listed these in such a happy rush, I'm pretty sure I've made some horrible mistake. Like mislabel a bead as 'nipple ring' level mistake.
Crusty Crackle Pins. 4 lollipop polymer clay artisan head pins in blue with gold glitter shards.

Crusty Crackle Pins. 4 lollipop polymer clay artisan head pins in blue with gold glitter shards.

Crusty Crackle Pins.
So if you hop over to the shop and see anything about nipple rings, please let me know won't you?
Crusty Crackle Pins. 6 teardrop polymer clay artisan head pins in blue with gold glitter shards.

Crusty Crackle Pins. 6 teardrop polymer clay artisan head pins in blue with gold glitter shards.

Crusty Crackle Pins.
So y'all remember when I had all these beads:

I had made, the pink and grey ones? They were ok but not that exciting?

Stone Path. Polymer clay jewelry elements with striated, faceted texture. 4 beads and 3 head pins. 9-11mm.

Stone Path. Polymer clay jewelry elements with striated, faceted textu...
I gave up on them suddenly and magically seducing me, so I took my knife and faceted them all up.

Stone Path. 3 earring pair sets. Polymer clay art beads with striated, faceted texture. 9-11mm.

Stone Path. 3 earring pair sets. Polymer clay art beads with striated,...
I was worried not knowing what I'd find under there, thinking it was just one plain color.

Stone Path. Polymer clay jewelry elements with striated, faceted texture. 4 beads and 2 head pins. 9-11mm.

Stone Path. Polymer clay jewelry elements with striated, faceted textu...
Pretty pleasantly surprised.

Stone Path. 5 mix and match grey polymer clay art beads. Striated, faceted and pitted textures. 12-14mm.

Stone Path. 5 mix and match grey polymer clay art beads. Striated, fac...
Accentuated the facet edges with some black dry-brushing, as per Shipwreckdandy's tute.

Stone Path. 6 polymer clay head pins with striated, faceted texture. 9-11mm.

Stone Path. 6 polymer clay head pins with striated, faceted texture. 9...
None too shabby. Offering them in small batches. Now watch them sit forever and never sell.

Stone Path. 4 polymer clay head pins with striated, faceted texture. 9-11mm.

Stone Path. 4 polymer clay head pins with striated, faceted texture. 9...
Ok so from the file of lost listings, I found this necklace that I must've clicked Edit instead of Copy when listing something else and it disappeared:
Circle of Compassion. Rustic assemblage choker with amethyst, rose quartz, labradorite and recycled elements.

Circle of Compassion.

From the file of Damn-Where'd-This-Come-From, I found this guy:
Light of Being. Thick, chunky colorful rustic tribal bollywood choker.

Light of Being.
I made this a few years ago, back when I was experimenting with bright crazy colors. It has nothing to do with anything I make now. It's not expensive. *shrugs* ... I think it's cute.

Vintage pocket watch case train medallion pendant.
So finally, I've been considering adding a vintage randoms section in the shop. A lot of you guys keep a separate shop where you sell destash and vintage... I personally can't keep track of two different shops... And my shop already has all kinds of random things... So yeah I guess I'm doing this. I'm offering vintage bits that I feel like I couldn't really add to by making it into a finished piece. Like this one above. Throw a thick leather cord on it, make it long, and bam, you got a cool-ass piece.

Finally I'mma leave you with a little video of me making jewelry:
(via)
(About 2 thirds in she starts having multiple orgasms it's inspiring.)

6 comments:

RomAntiqueSoul said...: uhrrr...sponge orgasmic lady kinda gives me the creeps...I wonder if she's ever experience finger painting...what the hekk would happen then?! I really don't wanna know actually...

Anyways, a little confused on the first line "eks-ur-saizuh" ??? I mean it is 3 a.m. so maybe my brain has shut down...or I'm just being a foreigner, don't mind me...

Love the colorful bracelet...and the new beads, they have cool textures...I really need to sit down and make beadage that reminds me, it has been a while...so thanks for the inspiration and reminder ;-); 9/6/14, 2:05 AM
RomAntiqueSoul said...: *edit: "exercise!" got it!!! why do I get so excited that my mind started working again at 3...duh...sorry for my slow/sleepless-ness...going to bed now *waddle waddle...; 9/6/14, 2:08 AM
Anonymous said...: Crying here because ..." I can't take just one size" and "I'm going to squeeze and squeeze." You have to watch the posh ones! Glad to here you're enjoying the gym and I'm loving the bead caps. really neat.; 9/6/14, 3:33 AM
Juliette said...: "Squeeze, and squeeze....."
"I wonder if you can go straight?"

Just a few highlights of sponge lady. Wow, that started my day off right!! Where did you FIND her?

Anyway, I haven't tried the cardstock either, and may just have to after I get tired of pictures outside. Still getting used to our new place and the light!; 9/6/14, 1:06 PM
Anneenomouse said...: That's hysterical!; 9/16/14, 9:34 AM
StaroftheEast said...: Darn, I always knew that something was lacking in my sex life, but never suspected that what was lacking was an sponge...or three :(; 10/19/14, 4:12 AM