fanciful devices: New Photos

A Stone Is Nobody's

A man ambushed a stone. Caught it.
Made it a prisoner.
Put it in a dark room and stood guard over it for the rest of his life.

His mother asked why.

He said, because it's held captive, because it is captured.

Look, the stone is asleep, she said, it does not know whether it's in a garden or not. Eternity and the stone
are mother and daughter; it is you who are getting old. The stone is only sleeping.

But I caught it, mother, it is mine by conquest, he said.

A stone is nobody's, not even its own. It is you who are conquered; you are minding the prisoner, which is yourself,
because you are afraid to go out, she said.

Yes yes, I am afraid, because you have never loved me, he said.

Which is true, because you have always been to me as the stone is to you, she said.

Russell Edson

FAQs

1. Are you a Southeast Asian dancing girl from the 1800s?

No, sorry to disappoint. My avatar and banner images are from an ancient book I found in the depths of my grandmother's cabinets. More on that here.

2. How do you make everything look so old?

First, you need a good oxidizer to brush on every bit of metal you can reach. I'll tell you all about it here.

Then there's this wax. I first mentioned it here. You'll have to scroll down a lot.

3. How can you be so productive?

I'm insanely obsessed and I have no offspring. I do nothing else- I don't have a day job, I don't clean my house or cook, I spend all day in pjs, often completely abandoning personal hygiene... I only interact with other humans when I walk my dog. And I like people! But I prefer dogs.

And I'm sloppy- but I make that sloppiness work for me.

4. Any tips you'd like to share?

No! Except for these 16 posts about techniques and this one about how to find your aesthetic.

5. Would you be offended if I took some inspiration from your designs?

Well, I'd be happier if you outright copied them.

No really, imitation is how we learn. I have enough ideas to go around. And even if I don't- please. No one's going to do this obsessively enough to threaten my business. (Probably.) I learned by copying others and I've seen others copy me as a step toward developing their own voice. So feel free. (I'd love if you tossed me a link in my comments, so I can feel like a proud momma.)

6. What do you look like?

Why, what have you heard? Really? Wow.

11/7/11

New Photos

-Now with even more Sparrow Glow™!

I have some awesome 'narratives' for my item listing given to me by a new etsybud, HappyFallout.

It all started when I got a mysterious comment that started, "I'm an astrophysicist lurker..."

I kept thinking, "Could I really have myself a real live astrophysicist reading my silly bloog?" Cuz I use lots of astronomy in descriptions. I find stuff that happens on such an unimaginably large and different scale, so far away to be extremely evocative. So I wrote her a note asking if it was so, and if she happened to have any other tidbits to share. Turns out she kept a file of just such bits! And she shared a ton. Squeeee!!!

Though what was REALLY surprising was that she said she had just been about to convo me. She is a ceramics artist and made me a set of MATTE CERAMIC BEADS! After she'd read my many rants about my hatred of all things shiny.

Can you believe? I can't.

In addition, she apologized for any possibly confusing parts of her tidbits since, she said, English wasn't her 1st language. Which was shocking since I've been an ESL teacher for 14 years and I can tell you- her English is impeccable. In any case, one bit contained this sentence: "The electrons can only have discrete values of energy, corresponding to discrete orbits around the nucleus. "

To which I responded:

"I'm going to just guess that when you say 'discrete values' and 'discrete orbits' that's science talk for 'specific values' and 'specific orbits'. I mean I know I've heard it in science talk before. In regular talk, discrete is , like, someone who can keep your secrets. Or like, if you order a sex toy over the internet it will come in 'discrete packaging'. It won't say 'BOBS WORLD OF DILDOS!' It'll be a plain box."

Patting myself on the back for that particular funny, I read this response in growing horror:

"Ms. Teacher, I think you are wrong about 'discrete'! Unless it's an American thingie, 'discrete' is the opposite of 'continuous', whereas sex toys should be packaged 'discreetly'. Look:
en.wiktionary.org/wiki/discrete
en.wiktionary.org/wiki/discreet"

Yeah. Turns out there are 2 different words: discrete and discreet. And also, I'm retarded. Sure, nobody else here knew that about discrete, but y'all weren't all "I'm a teacher, let me edumacate ya!"

I mention this because I get so many lovely comments here about how awesome I am, it gets kind of intense. So I had to share a very un-awesome moment.

Telling everyone when I do something retarded somehow spreads my shame around, too. Cuz I was soooooo embarrassed!!! Ugh.

Anywhozits, I'm working on 2 more dramatic chokers like the above and another couple bangle piles. 2 of which are gonna be... (wait for it)... colorful.

This pile is actually spoken for, but that's just cuz it's the gal that got me started on these in the 1st place. Other than that, I'm actually taking a vacation from reserves. Reserves drive me nuts. I'm not doing any more til all my current reserves get bought up. In 5 years.

8 comments:

Flotsam Tide said...: good lord woman fourth photo from the top! I love those colors and the raw crystals with the ceramic focal and carved netsuke. Your chokers are amazing. Oh wait... more intense flattery... hmmm you thinking that your reserves are going to take 5 years to be bought up is unrealistic, I see how quickly how your stuff moves. Nice stack... (that sounds wrong doesn't it.. :); 11/7/11, 5:12 PM
E Makes Art said...: Those dramatic chokers are fantastic... what if you made big ol' wide dramatic bangles with the same feel... those colors and dangles!! Oh that would rock!! Dramatic Dangle Bangles. DOOOO IIITTTT!!!!

xoEsther; 11/7/11, 5:34 PM
fanciful devices said...: HU! never thought of that. wow. something to mull over... would it even work? wouldnt you put someone's eye out w/such a dangling bracelet focal?
now i gotta think.
thank you for that!; 11/8/11, 12:06 AM
Penelope said...: Yeah dude, you are still smarter than most of the teachers I've met.

And I DIED when i laid eyes on that golden hued choker. If I were the kind of girl who wore chunky or chokers, I'd be all over that like stink.; 11/8/11, 12:14 AM
Carol said...: WOW those were worth waiting for! Again hail Queen of Darkness!; 11/8/11, 1:00 AM
Janet said...: Colorful bangle stacks?! Let me catch my breath. Ummmmm can't wait. Could it be because we haven't seen the sun for days now that Autumn has moved in here in the grey midwest? And we know that's our view for the coming months. Ugh. That's what I'm going with.
Reserves are driving you crazy, eh? But I've only done one....after you suggested I could. Really, just one, once. Let me go bang my head on the wall cuz those colorful bangle sets are gonna fly outta your shop and slip through my fingers again. So sad. Would love to get a shot at them. Hahaha so I hafta sit perched and ready to pounce on that " buy" button from now on? Ok if you insist :); 11/8/11, 9:10 AM
happyfallout said...: Thank you for all the kind words -- it was so fun meeting you!
I think that besides the fact that 'discrete' is a pretty specific term, it's usually easier to remember quirks of a particular language from 'outside'. Like in this pic: http://s3.amazonaws.com/iwsmt.smellmybacon.com/October-04-2011-21-46-41-ENGLISHISACRAZYLANGUAGE.jpg

Love the listings. They seem to come together with those puny factoids so well. And that Virgocentric infall necklace.. It's magnificent.; 11/8/11, 11:56 AM
E Makes Art said...: You're welcome!! I feel so honored that you're considering my idea ;-) Hmm... Put someone's eye out? It might, but it'd be worth it! Or just maybe not a long pointy dangle. Why am I even trying to solve the problem... you're a freakin genius... you figure it out! I can't wait to see what you come up with!

xoEsther; 11/8/11, 9:39 PM