fanciful devices: Juicing Update

A Stone Is Nobody's

A man ambushed a stone. Caught it.
Made it a prisoner.
Put it in a dark room and stood guard over it for the rest of his life.

His mother asked why.

He said, because it's held captive, because it is captured.

Look, the stone is asleep, she said, it does not know whether it's in a garden or not. Eternity and the stone
are mother and daughter; it is you who are getting old. The stone is only sleeping.

But I caught it, mother, it is mine by conquest, he said.

A stone is nobody's, not even its own. It is you who are conquered; you are minding the prisoner, which is yourself,
because you are afraid to go out, she said.

Yes yes, I am afraid, because you have never loved me, he said.

Which is true, because you have always been to me as the stone is to you, she said.

Russell Edson

FAQs

1. Are you a Southeast Asian dancing girl from the 1800s?

No, sorry to disappoint. My avatar and banner images are from an ancient book I found in the depths of my grandmother's cabinets. More on that here.

2. How do you make everything look so old?

First, you need a good oxidizer to brush on every bit of metal you can reach. I'll tell you all about it here.

Then there's this wax. I first mentioned it here. You'll have to scroll down a lot.

3. How can you be so productive?

I'm insanely obsessed and I have no offspring. I do nothing else- I don't have a day job, I don't clean my house or cook, I spend all day in pjs, often completely abandoning personal hygiene... I only interact with other humans when I walk my dog. And I like people! But I prefer dogs.

And I'm sloppy- but I make that sloppiness work for me.

4. Any tips you'd like to share?

No! Except for these 16 posts about techniques and this one about how to find your aesthetic.

5. Would you be offended if I took some inspiration from your designs?

Well, I'd be happier if you outright copied them.

No really, imitation is how we learn. I have enough ideas to go around. And even if I don't- please. No one's going to do this obsessively enough to threaten my business. (Probably.) I learned by copying others and I've seen others copy me as a step toward developing their own voice. So feel free. (I'd love if you tossed me a link in my comments, so I can feel like a proud momma.)

6. What do you look like?

Why, what have you heard? Really? Wow.

4/4/13

Juicing Update

OK, the kiddoes are in town so I haven't had time to finish anything new the last few days. However! I had to share a little something about a little ol' ingredient called Aloe. If you look it up, the pictures on line will look all impeccable like so→
In the supermarket- the Mexican supermarket of course, pretty sure you can't get these at Jewel- they look more like so↓
And yeah they come with their very own smiling lady holding on to them, smartasses!

Claire Cromah, from Sierra Leone, selects aloe plants at Compare Foods in Durham.

Just shove that shit in the juicer. How much? I don't know! The whole thing, half the thing, have some balls ladies, why does everyone need a recipe? Shove whatever fruit and veggies you have around along with. I had some just-about-to-turn strawberries and a bunch of other stuff and the juice was like heaven. The aloe has no taste but it does have a scratchy spicy aftertaste that blends amazingly with sweet fruity/veggie tastes. I also like to balance the sweet juice with some ginger and a bit of orange peel I leave on the oranges. Robust. And there's a zillion good things in aloe, it will basically save your immortal soul if you read up the benefits.

Let me make up for the eyecandy-free post with some kitty gifs.

5 comments:

Jiorji said...: aloe sounds deli.....OMG KITTIES!!!!!!!!!!; 4/4/13, 1:50 PM
Beatnheart said...: The kittens are so beautiful... The one looks like he's laying on a massage table.. Took me awhile to realize that is a lil bunny on the bottom... Ok bunnies and kittens... Life if perfect right now.; 4/4/13, 3:49 PM
Wildthorne said...: Thanks for the suggestion... I still have yet to try the aloe, there is some growing wild at my mom's house that I will take next time. Fresh juice is heavenly!; 4/4/13, 7:01 PM
Unknown said...: My Darling Daughter-in-law juiced me up a great drink when my knee was healing. Had Spinach, apples, a bannana, carrots, and I don't know all what else but thing tasted incredible. Maybe I ought to try some of this myself. The Aloe does sound good....aside from the great benefits.; 4/4/13, 9:59 PM
alteredarcheology said...: Too much aloe will make you poop. A lot.

Cute kitties!!!; 4/5/13, 12:09 PM