fanciful devices: This 'n' That

A Stone Is Nobody's

A man ambushed a stone. Caught it.
Made it a prisoner.
Put it in a dark room and stood guard over it for the rest of his life.

His mother asked why.

He said, because it's held captive, because it is captured.

Look, the stone is asleep, she said, it does not know whether it's in a garden or not. Eternity and the stone
are mother and daughter; it is you who are getting old. The stone is only sleeping.

But I caught it, mother, it is mine by conquest, he said.

A stone is nobody's, not even its own. It is you who are conquered; you are minding the prisoner, which is yourself,
because you are afraid to go out, she said.

Yes yes, I am afraid, because you have never loved me, he said.

Which is true, because you have always been to me as the stone is to you, she said.

Russell Edson

FAQs

1. Are you a Southeast Asian dancing girl from the 1800s?

No, sorry to disappoint. My avatar and banner images are from an ancient book I found in the depths of my grandmother's cabinets. More on that here.

2. How do you make everything look so old?

First, you need a good oxidizer to brush on every bit of metal you can reach. I'll tell you all about it here.

Then there's this wax. I first mentioned it here. You'll have to scroll down a lot.

3. How can you be so productive?

I'm insanely obsessed and I have no offspring. I do nothing else- I don't have a day job, I don't clean my house or cook, I spend all day in pjs, often completely abandoning personal hygiene... I only interact with other humans when I walk my dog. And I like people! But I prefer dogs.

And I'm sloppy- but I make that sloppiness work for me.

4. Any tips you'd like to share?

No! Except for these 16 posts about techniques and this one about how to find your aesthetic.

5. Would you be offended if I took some inspiration from your designs?

Well, I'd be happier if you outright copied them.

No really, imitation is how we learn. I have enough ideas to go around. And even if I don't- please. No one's going to do this obsessively enough to threaten my business. (Probably.) I learned by copying others and I've seen others copy me as a step toward developing their own voice. So feel free. (I'd love if you tossed me a link in my comments, so I can feel like a proud momma.)

6. What do you look like?

Why, what have you heard? Really? Wow.

7/7/11

This 'n' That

OK, these are up:

Aquabib.

A Party of Owls.

Lococession.

Here's some WIP. Disclaimer- my floor is so orangey in photos that I'm always trying to fix it and the color ends up all weird. Anyways, I'm still mulling these over.

But it seems like there's so many supplies just screaming to be used!

"Give birth to me Mommy!" They yell. In my head. (Creee-py!)

How about these? What will they become?

Which will be first to exist? I wonder as I lay out a buncha different things, re-arrange a hundred elements.

I also got some mail goodies from SacredCake, including among others, these:

And then I pulled this out and peed myself:

An actual quote of mine from this post.

So now there's pee all over my floor and I blame you SacredCake- if that even is your real name!

3 comments:

Penelope said...: HAHAHA! make realistic plans! Man I've been wanting to make a cushion or some shit with that on it for ages, I think it's gold.

This is gunna sound weird, but I kind of envy that you work on the floor. I've done it like that before and it's a good method for me, to be able to sit surrounded by things. I need a desk right now though- really it's just floor on legs, because underneath there's mountains of crap that I don't have anywhere else for should the table be removed.; 7/7/11, 11:58 PM
Jennifer Valentine Morford said...: omg....I KNEW you would laugh! I laughed ever time I looked at it!
What a fantastic quote...what if, in like, 80 years, there your quote is in some huge quote anthology?!; 7/8/11, 4:49 AM
Linda said...: Whaahaaa, it's perfect, Jen!! The framed quote, I mean. And kudos for getting one over on Fanci! She's too cool for school.
ps--I want a pillow. Anyone?; 7/8/11, 6:45 PM