*No patent pending.
There's only one pair of earrings in this whole post for general consumption. But all this means I don't have to measure, I only take three pix of anything and never a size reference one. I don't have to worry about using expensive supplies in things no one's gonna buy. I don't have to describe it in a listing or come up with a clever title or quote. Or fucking tags! That's what having a patron means to me... God, I'm so sorry you guys, I didn't mean to be rubbing it in. But remember, before etsy I was a useless mess. Like, lying in the gutter eating my own poop useless.
Aaaaaaanyways, these stones are REAL DIAMONDS. Very rough and raw, they dange under silver spoons with antique porcelain teefs found in a dentist's estate. Real but imperfect diamonds, fake but perfect teeth- fancifuldevices: for all your ironic symbolism needs.
As for my auntie time, within an hour of arriving in Wisconsin, I had a seven year old boy asking me, "Why do all girls have gainas with hairs?"
Which reminded me of a time with David when he threw a ball right into my crotch. He started laughing and said, "I hit your penis!" When I explained that girls didn't have penises and he said, "Oops, I forgot."
So last time there was a day he came over and was playing for quite a while without removing his outer wear. So jokingly I started going, "Take off your coat! Take off your scarf! Take off your hat! Take off your shoes! Don't take off your pants!"
"Haha! Cuz then you could see my underwear!"
"Or even my penis."
"I couldn't see your penis though."
"Cuz girls don't have penises, hu?"
"I'm really lucky though."
"Cuz I get to have my penis!"