fanciful devices: Glow and QnA

A Stone Is Nobody's

A man ambushed a stone. Caught it.
Made it a prisoner.
Put it in a dark room and stood guard over it for the rest of his life.

His mother asked why.

He said, because it's held captive, because it is captured.

Look, the stone is asleep, she said, it does not know whether it's in a garden or not. Eternity and the stone
are mother and daughter; it is you who are getting old. The stone is only sleeping.

But I caught it, mother, it is mine by conquest, he said.

A stone is nobody's, not even its own. It is you who are conquered; you are minding the prisoner, which is yourself,
because you are afraid to go out, she said.

Yes yes, I am afraid, because you have never loved me, he said.

Which is true, because you have always been to me as the stone is to you, she said.

Russell Edson

FAQs

1. Are you a Southeast Asian dancing girl from the 1800s?

No, sorry to disappoint. My avatar and banner images are from an ancient book I found in the depths of my grandmother's cabinets. More on that here.

2. How do you make everything look so old?

First, you need a good oxidizer to brush on every bit of metal you can reach. I'll tell you all about it here.

Then there's this wax. I first mentioned it here. You'll have to scroll down a lot.

3. How can you be so productive?

I'm insanely obsessed and I have no offspring. I do nothing else- I don't have a day job, I don't clean my house or cook, I spend all day in pjs, often completely abandoning personal hygiene... I only interact with other humans when I walk my dog. And I like people! But I prefer dogs.

And I'm sloppy- but I make that sloppiness work for me.

4. Any tips you'd like to share?

No! Except for these 16 posts about techniques and this one about how to find your aesthetic.

5. Would you be offended if I took some inspiration from your designs?

Well, I'd be happier if you outright copied them.

No really, imitation is how we learn. I have enough ideas to go around. And even if I don't- please. No one's going to do this obsessively enough to threaten my business. (Probably.) I learned by copying others and I've seen others copy me as a step toward developing their own voice. So feel free. (I'd love if you tossed me a link in my comments, so I can feel like a proud momma.)

6. What do you look like?

Why, what have you heard? Really? Wow.

10/31/11

Glow and QnA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!
I DID IT! I GOT THE MUDDAFOOKIN SPARROW GLOW!!!!!!!!!!!
Finally. It's a combo of the 'multiply' and 'screen' layers on photoshop elements. Phew.
Check it, bitches:

Autosmartfix, then lower saturation if needed, then layers, then multiply and screen then mess with opacity, then merge layers... Something like that.

Katy, it makes me very happy to know my vocab is so uselessly florid and convoluted as to not be instantaneously understood. Means I'm fancy.

From wikipedia:
"Tetanus is often associated with rust, especially rusty nails, but this concept is misleading. Objects that accumulate rust are often found outdoors, or in places that harbor anaerobic bacteria, but the rust itself does not cause tetanus nor does it contain more C. tetani bacteria. The rough surface of rusty metal merely provides a prime habitat for a C. tetani endospore to reside, and the nail affords a means to puncture skin and deliver endospore into the wound."

As for how to search reserves, just put the buyer's name in the 'handmade' search. Since seller's put RESERVED FOR X in the title... etc. Some don't but, you get a good idea anyways.

Also, it's taking me a while to mail off the rest of the giveaway prizes. Since they're overseas and stuff, I gotta get my ass to the post office an I don't have a car... I should go to the UPS store... For things I sell, I always use priority boxes. But 2 of the winners are overseas and priority for that is $13... hurts me in my cheaps.

What else, oh, we're allowed to say we don't like things here. In this female-centric society of craftblog/etsy, people are crazy polite about each other's feelings, and I think that's sweet and great, but I'm a teeny bit more thick skinned... especially about a video I didn't even make. Though I did think it was funny as all hell. Didj'all notice the dude's shirts? I loved the fugly shirts.

To make up for the creepy video, I bring you, straight from the cuteporters over at cuteoverload, momma red panda picking up baby. Chester Zoo - Red Panda Baby

Click photos for cute-hance. Chester Zoo - Red Panda Baby

Swing:

Well, now if you now need to get the saccharine taste outcher mouth, here's a free and printable pdf for a 12-page booklet of horrifyingly creative profanities, brought to you by the readership of regretsy.com.

These are all details of the ever-growing pile of amber/brown pile. From the last set of darker piles. They've gone from 'stacks' to 'piles' b/c I can't keep them in stack formation anymore.

Imna go list all these after some grub.

6 comments:

Numinosity said...: I am just loving how many questions you manage to answer in a post and thought it was super cool for you to say copy anything you see here, I'm not that brave to say that and mean it.
Thought you might want to see how your earrings made it to an official Etsy wedding on my blog here taken next to the coolest looking Athabascan Indian dude too. http://numinositybeads.blogspot.com/2011/10/didnt-know-i-was-at-etsy-wedding-this.html
Loving your blog always although I don't always comment, know the fancilove is there.
xoxo Kim; 10/31/11, 5:37 PM
Janet said...: Whooooa the glow is making my eyes hurt! The new pics look amazing. The detail in your jewelry is even more impressive than before, which is kinda unbelievable that I can be more impressed. Every new batch is fab.
Another technique question for your faq section, know you love em. Do you seal your tin when you use it for a bezel? My oxidizer on tin seems to rub off unless I seal it, everytime. And yup, I use the same oxidizers.; 10/31/11, 8:13 PM
carol said...: h fanci....

what a gorgeous collection of stuff.
(i'm a looker more than a reader, though i do read the stuff in your blog but i don't always get it.. so the lookin is far easier than the readin).....
but.. i do hope i get to see some of this stuff available in yourstore before it goesso that i can get a chance to buy some... geez your stuff just goes so quickly...
i think someone out there really appreciates your talent for putting bits together.. well.. more than someone.. lots of someones..including me...

have a good one
cHeers
caRolS; 11/1/11, 12:36 AM
Penelope said...: OOooOOoOOooooh!! She's getting close! No seriously the light on those first 3 bangle pics is loverly. You won't need my photography tutorial post when it's done! (Half way there...okay a third. Probably.); 11/1/11, 2:32 AM
Aqua Junko Artworks said...: I can not be polite any more...I hate that you are so creative and all your work is so great. I don't personally hate you that is but just that star that granted you the talent and not me. OK I guess you're special and deserve it...OK I don't hate you or the star or your creativity. Whatever. Lori; 11/1/11, 3:56 PM
Anonymous said...: Liking the HD photos you can see a lot more detail and texture. Really love the bangles and the bead combos on them. On the subject of profanity nothing is more funny than a posh Brit swearing- check out Hugh Grant's delivery of the f word in 4 weddings!; 11/2/11, 2:40 AM